Twenty One years ago today, I married a man who I had spent 8 years with, and I loved, and he loved me. We had three wonderful young sons together, and for the five years we were married, I thought I loved him and I thought he loved me. I was wrong on both counts. Can't love someone you hate. Can't love someone who hates you. It's coming up on 16 years (November 2) that my life changed. And, I still wonder how. How someone can "love" you one minute and "hate" you the next, so much that they want you dead, no matter the cost.
Any way, pretty much all of my dysfuntional systems in my body, (and yes, there are a lot of them), can pretty much be linked back to that one day. There is no official ONE
diagnosis for the multiple movement disorders, dysfunctioning brain, or even the chronic migraine that I've had since that day 1. Well, day 2, since I couldn't feel a thing after a while. It just comes down to that day, I probably get to look forward to more disfunctioning systems.
I'm use to fighting dysfunctioning systems, like my marriage (shattered), and the justice system (flawed is a simple term), but my family, not dysfunctioning. Surviving.
Anyway, over these past years, I am not just lucky to be alive, and get a second chance at life, me, my boys, we all got a second chance at life, and one where we could live our life. We overcame obstacles, and we support each other. And unfortunately, now, they take care of me more than I can take care of them.
For the record, it's not something you can "just get over," especially when you actually feel the pain, and remember what pain you felt on that day.
This is not just about me. Well, it is, but I really just want to say, and i'll say this over and over again, if you see something, say something. What you see and what you say, can save a life, and it could even be your own.
October is Domestic Violence month, but be aware year round. It's not just about flying fists, it's about control, violence, financial control, and verbal abuse.
If you're looking for a full account of my story, you can watch my personal video at
(it is a bit long).
Or in November, pick up a copy of my special Edition 2021 of Fractured Tears, and the end of the book gives details of most of my story.
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